Family

As you may know, my little sister recently had a baby, Miss Faye Elizabeth Thomas, born September 12.  Here is a picture of her.  She is simply PRECIOUS!!!

And here is a picture of two of Faye's biggest fans who also happen to be the best labor and delivery assistants ever.  EVER.

 

 

Truly we were remarkable, which is no small thing given that Terri was in labor for 26 hours and we all have very different personalities.  As I can recall, there were really only two times Terri gave us the death look....  Once when Christi tried to strike up a conversation about Jazzercise with one of the nurses who came in to help Terri push, and another time when I made up some funny labor-related lyrics to the hymn "Morning Has Broken".  In our defense both of these mishaps occurred around hour 25 and everyone was exhausted by then.

 

As I pray for Terri and Faye and the next phase in their lives, I think a lot about family, how these days the world makes and takes all kinds.  A friend of mine remarked a few weeks ago that my own immediate family was pretty conventional growing up.  My dad worked, my mom stayed home with us.  In December my parents will celebrate 39 years of marriage to each other.  But when I think about all the different family dynamics rolling around out there I'm not sure there is a "conventional" anymore.  Whether or not that's the way God intended it, it's like it says in Romans, all things work together for good.  Through God's grace the concept of family exists regardless of race, religion, gender or distance. 

 

My own family has been making a mass exodus from Houston for the last several years, not to mention several good friends along the way.  Each time someone moves I get a little more discontented with God.  I'm sure He's got lots ahead for our family in the next season of life, but I was quite comfortable in the old season, thank you very much.  What will I do if we end up with no family in the area?  Bother my neighbors I guess, though that's not such a bad thing.  Through the love and provision of Christ we create family with or without biology. 

 

To those friends and loved ones close by, you are a blessing.  You are a constant reminder of God's love for me, the greatest sort of gift.  To those far away, what God has put in our hearts is not simply undone, so that's where you stay, day in and day out, no matter the distance.  And if any time God should choose to move any of y'all back to the Houston area we will joyfully bother you, too!!  But bring your game face.  We play to win. 

 

   

 

 XOXO...Kelly

I am PERFECT. Really.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Cor 12:9

People often ask me how I do it with four small boys.  Well, Sunday I forgot to put on deodorant and today I realized at noon that I never brushed my teeth in the morning.  When Paul wrote his second letter to the church at Corinth he had a lot of defending himself to do.  People did not trust him and his persecution was great.  But God still called Paul to go into the world and continued to do amazing things through him.  In Chapter 12 Paul tells the church,

"To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it from me.  But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

 

Now there are some undeniable differences between Paul and I.  One, my discipleship is nowhere near what his was and as for persecution, well, our Chihuahua poops on the floor a lot.  Two, I do not delight in weakness, insults, hardships, persecution, or difficulties.  Who does?  But there is a great peace that comes along with remembering where our hope comes from.  One thing about weakness and hardship is that it reminds us how very human we are, and how very sovereign God is.

 

I used to pray for perfection frequently, as a wife, as a mother, as a friend, as an employee.  I always came up short.  It's not that I don't think God wants me to be good at things (or remember my deodorant).  He just didn't design us to have all of the answers.  Instead I pray for the grace to do all of things through Him.  We need the perfection of His power above our own.  He is God after all. 

 



XOXO...Kelly

It's fall y'all!

I have a subscription to Southern Living magazine, which I greatly enjoy.  Everything in it is so pretty and quaint and well done, which is a nice escape sometimes from the reality around here where everything is pretty, but covered in pee; quaint, but covered in pee; and well done, but covered in pee.  And dog hair.  More than once I've found myself feeling like a stranger looking in on the world of Southern Living.  For example, I don't iron my sheets.  I don't have time and also THAT'S CRAZY.  I don't really even iron my clothes.  (Shout out to my amazing husband, Kevin, who irons his own shirts!!!)  Also most of the recipes, though enticing, require more than 3 ingredients and almost never involve a can of cream of chicken soup or hot dogs.  But the folks at Southern Living and I could not be more on the same page this month!  We are on the same page about fall, specifically Halloween.

Here's my deal with Halloween.  It's ugly.  Our household Halloween decorations include the decoupaged word "Boo" on our front door, three plastic placemats and a hand towel with a spider on it.  Like the SL editor says, "All this month's glorification of death and dismemberment runs counter to the beauty of changing leaves, cooler temperatures and warm casseroles popping right out of the oven....There's enough angst in the world these days, and folks seem plenty on edge without editors like me having to come up with new ways to frighten their friends and neighbors."  Okay, so it's not cooler and there really is no changing leaf color in Houston, but his point is well taken.  Don't we have something better to celebrate?

Also, I'm a huge chicken.  I never could, and still can not, watch a scary movie.  I am 33 and the idea of zombies terrifies me.  Most people cross a line into adulthood and are able to laugh at the absurdly horrible, can celebrate Halloween as nothing more than a day to have some fun and mock death, even go so far as to celebrate that Christ overcame it.  I just can not.  It is too darn ugly.

All that being said, yes, I take my kids trick-or-treating.  In case they develop the ability to grow up like reasonable unafraid adults, I do not want to hinder that.  Also, boys generally don't think zombies are gross.  So I will continue to keep my issues as my own and consider the candy I steal from them as retribution for my silence.

But there are indeed better things to celebrate.  Fall reminds us that things change, and, with God's grace, do so beautifully (even in Houston).  We move into the season of Thanksgiving and are reminded how important counting our blessings really is.  We are given respite from the heat of summer and its long, crazy days.  Whether you have a huge, fake fuzzy spider in your yard with glowing eyes and skeletons hanging from your trees (arg....) or not, I hope you take some time today to welcome fall into your heart, and all that God has given us to celebrate in this season of life. 

XOXO....Kelly    

 

Never say never.

Much of our adolescence, when my sisters and I would play house, I would insist that Terri's "character" have four boys and drive a van.  I thought this was hilarious. 

And the Lord replied...

For months and months we have complained about our neighbors and their horrible, yappy dogs that get up at all hours of the night and bark relentlessly. 

And the Lord replied...

 

I believe that your children should eat what you tell them to eat, so if you want them to eat healthy food you should make them eat healthy food.  They are kids, not adults, and they don't call the shots.

 

And the Lord replied...



 

I'm counting my blessings today and understanding that God's plans for my life are clearly better than my own (except maybe the Chihuahua, though I'm sure there's a good lesson to be learned there, too).  "To man belong the plans of the heart, but from the Lord comes the reply of the tongue. All a man's ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the Lord. Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed. The Lord works out everything for his own ends, even the wicked for a day of disaster....In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps."  Proverbs 16: 1-4, 9. 

 

I've got two options when it comes to following God...I can trust or I can doubt.  To trust doesn't always mean to understand or even to be happy about it (see aforementioned Chihuahua), but to know "that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him".  He took Christ from the manger to the cross, from earth to the sky all so that as we "share in his sufferings we may also share in His glory."  Can God then also handle my day full of laundry and dishes and emails and carpools?  And the Lord replied.....yeah, I got this.

 

XOXO...Kelly

   

 



My Karate Kid

Several months ago I showed the boys the original Karate Kid movie, the one with Daniel-son and Mr. Miyagi.  Ever since then it has been karate-this, karate-that around our house.  Michael, especially, has become quite berserk.  He practiced "the crane" off the diving board all summer long.  Whenever there's a disagreement between brothers he attempts to settle it by sweeping someone's legs out from underneath them or kicking them in the stomach.  He's teaching Zachary to meditate.  Despite my constant insistence that you can not become a black belt from watching Ninjago, Michael is convinced that he possesses some supernatural karate powers.  In case you're about to suggest that we should just sign him up for martial arts, NO.  I just don't have it in me.  Besides, Michael chose flag football as his activity of choice this fall.  He has been dying to play ever since last fall when Blake played and got an amazing, very realistic football jersey for the games.  I can't say I blame him.  I once signed up for dance because I thought we'd get white gloves for our recital costumes.  When my mom told me she wouldn't buy the outfit unless I actually danced in the recital I quit. 

Michael is nothing if not an intense young man.  He approaches every new skill like a cross between Yosemite Sam and the Tasmanian Devil (see aforementioned references to karate).  It takes extreme concentration for him to simply pull the flag during a game and not also mow the other player over entirely.  By the end of his game on Saturday he had knocked over two kids, both of them on his team.  On our way home, as we were rehashing all of the highlights from the game, I told Michael he needed to watch his roughness or the coach would make him sit out.  And here was his actual response...

"Mom, I just can't help it.  It's just that my karate makes me so powerful and I can't control my powers!"

Right. 

I remember when I started as the youth director and I was constantly in this dual position of being totally amazed and totally frustrated with the youth around me.  How bright and funny and wonderful they were!  What talent they possessed and charisma!  And yet, how obnoxious!!  One boy I knew had the most infectious personality.  If he was in a good mood we'd have a great day.  But if he was in a bad mood he would take everyone around him down with him.  I learned quickly that they key to any great gift is to harness its power for good.  The Spiderman Theory, I like to call it.  With great power comes great responsibility.  Michael's intensity is indeed a gift, when pointed in the right direction. 

"You are the light of the world.  A city on a hill can not be hidden.  Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl.  Instead they put it on its stand and it gives light to everyone in the house.  In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."  Matthew 5:14-16

Your talents are no accident.  They are your own unique opportunities to do good.  I'll never forget the woman at my church that stood up and talked about her love for animals during a stewardship campaign.  I had never considered that ministry operated so much outside the church that it could extend to animal shelters, but she was so right!!  Ministry is everywhere.  Use what you've got to make a difference.  Whether its your child, a volunteer at school, a coworker or a family member.  Maybe that someone who is driving you crazy is just another person with amazing potential that needs pointed in the right direction.

Lord, helpful me to be mindful of my own gifts, that I have them pointed in the right direction, so that others would see your glory through me.  And help me to point my own children in the right direction, to show them how to honor you through their gifts, that Your Light would shine through them.  Amen. 

I love you, Michael.....you big goober.  I love you.

 

 

XOXO...Kelly

For Carole...the Meat Story

My good and wonderful friend, Nick, lost his mom last week to cancer.  Carole Olivero, pictured above with my friend Nick and Michael (at age 4 months), had more compassion, intensity, expectation and character packed into her five foot body than of anyone I have ever known.  She was an amazing woman who made lifelong friendships and knew no strangers. 

 

Carole loved to feed people and when you visited her house you sat down to eat.  At the table and all at once.  None of this buffet business where you grab a piece of pizza and sit on the couch and you did not wear a hat.  I attended a family dinner at the Olivero house one night.  It was the first time I'd been at a family dinner with all four kids there and their boyfriends and girlfriends, so there were a lot of people around the table.  Being with the Olivero's is an experience in and of itself.  There is no small talk.  There are opinions, jokes and someone usually always quotes Seinfeld.  It's mostly wonderful, but a little intimidating.  And to top it off Carole set down the largest tray of flank steak I have ever seen in my life followed by the largest bowl of mashed potatoes I had ever seen in my life.  And that's saying a lot because my sisters and I used to make my parents take us to the Chuck-o-Rama Family Buffet in Utah when we were younger.  As I put a piece of steak on my plate, Carole looked down at me and said, "Is that all you're going to eat?  You're so small!"  See what I mean?  Expectation.  I panicked a little.  I remember sitting at the table thinking, I don't think I can eat more than one piece of meat!!  What am I going to do??  Carol was not just interested in feeding people.  She was interested in filling them up, and she did it in more ways than one.

 

I think of the things in my life that feed me and I am grateful for them.  Singing in the choir at church, a fun craft project, volunteering with the boys' schools, writing this blog even.  These things bring me lots of enjoyment and they are important parts of my life.  But, oh, they are nothing compared to the things that fill me up.  My husband, my children, my faith.  All of the 40% Hobby Lobby coupons in the world couldn't do for me what one evening of rocking Parker to sleep does. 

 

What fills you up?  Carole knew, and she offered it to everyone who came into her home.  It resonated from her.  My little sister, Terri, welcomed her own sweet daughter into the world this week.  (This is totally a shameless plug for bragging on my beautiful little Faye Beth.)  I am betting the first time she looked at that tiny face she discovered a whole new way of being full. 

 

Christ puts things deep within us and all around us.  His spirit gives us the courage to draw on these things and fill up our lives with them.  We know what it is to feel blessed.  And when we manage, like Carole, to take the peace and joy that comes with these gifts and pass them on to others, we know what it is to be a blessing to others.  "And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which we are called in one body, and be thankful." Colossians 3:15.  Be full, friends.  Be full.

 

XOXO...Kelly

 

 

Wednesday

So I was gawked at today, and not in the good way people might gawk at you when you're wearing a new outfit and your hair is done and your tan is awesome.  I actually had food hanging out of my mouth.  We were eating lunch in the car between errands and I was enjoying the new Wendy's Asiago Chicken Flatbread Sandwich.  Nothing but the best for lunch via drive thru.  Anyway, I was shoveling said sandwich into my mouth when I noticed the person in the vehicle next to me staring at me.  I am sure they were appalled.  There was dressing on my face and a tomato hanging out of my mouth.  I know, I know.  What would the people at Glamour Shots say if they could see me now?  But it's Wednesday and it's 100 degrees outside, so I don't care.  I'd like to say it's with maturity that I have developed this carefree attitude.  Maybe that's part of it.  But I've been gawked at a lot in the last five or six years of my life and each time it happens all I can do is look the person, smile, and think to myself, "you don't know anything about me."  And it's true.  I don't mean it in a snarky way, but there are a lot of people in the city of Houston.  I am not going to see all of them on a good day.  Generally speaking, what many people see of me is only a teeny blip of my life as they know it.  Is it fair for anyone to judge me based on one tiny blip?  Absolutely not, and it would be wrong of me to do the same to anyone else.  "This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God " James 1:19-20.  Oh, it's so tempting to make a comment about the mother with out of control kids in Target until you are that mother.  In my own family we have good trips to the store and bad trips.  To the older lady I once overheard remarking that she would certainly do better in my shoes I say, go ahead!  I'll be at the Starbucks near the entrance enjoying a white chocolate mocha when you're done. 

If there's anything I deserve an award for it would be my ability to control my road rage in a city the size of Houston.  But I am actually remarkably good at it.  When someone cuts me off I just imagine they are heading to an emergency.  When someone slows down way too much to turn into a parking lot I just imagine they have a cake in their car, or a basket of puppies they don't want to knock over.  I have no idea if any of this is true (it probably isn't), but I don't care.  Slow to judgment, slow to anger.  I've also got a killer Lionel Richie CD that can't help but put you in a good mood.  'Cause I'm once, twice, three times a lady..... 

I'd like it if everyone thought the best of me or, better yet, if the best of me was always what I have to offer.  But it's Wednesday and it's 100 degrees outside.  So when you see me at the red light with food hanging out of my mouth just assume I'm doing the best I can that day and move on.  I promise to do the same for you.

XOXO...Kelly