Soldier.

Oh, my sweet Michael.  This evening his faithful fish, Soldier, passed on to fish heaven.  He cried and cried as we prayed around the toilet together and flushed dear Soldier on to the next life.  It makes it a little bit easier that Michael is a boy.  I feel like if I had daughters there would have been no flushing.  Some sort of burial would have been demanded.  There would have been flowers and probably music.  Nonetheless, it's so hard to watch a kid lose a pet.  My little sister had a bunny when we were growing up named Thumper.  Thumper was awesome.  He came when you called him, you could hold him and carry him, he walked on a leash.  It was like he was part dog or something.  Well it came to pass one evening that Thumper was let outside at the same time as our poodle, Jake.  Thumper might have been part dog, but the other part of him was still rabbit and Jake, being all dog, attacked the rabbit.  To spare us from the difficult truth that one beloved pet would try to eat another one, my dad told us that Thumper saw the dog, got scared, had a heart attack and died.  It wasn't until I was in college that the truth dawned on me.  "Rabbits don't have heart attacks when they see dogs.  They run.  Wait a minute....."  And then I called my parents.  I believe that is probably the moment in my father's life when he realized I had become an adult, finally old enough to handle the truth, wise almost.  (If my father is reading this right now he is probably rolling his eyes.)  At any rate, this memory of our pet's passing brings to mind how God works in the passage of time, when something happens that doesn't make sense or, better yet, you don't even think to question.  And one day weeks or months or years later God reveals it to you.  It is an extraordinary thing to feel close to God's will.  For me it is so reassuring, how He can obliterate all the doubt of a century within the revelation of a single minute.  But it can be hard to wait while getting there.  I don't know a lot of people that like to admit out loud to doubting God, and while I feel like I don't question him much, I sure do get angry with Him, impatient.  Not too long ago I had a mental conversation with God that went something like this...."Okay, GOD.  I will wait this one out.  But I am NOT happy about it.  You had better have something good in mind."  Sound familiar?  "As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth; It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish the purpose for which I sent it."  Isaiah 55:10-11.  God's word don't mess around.  In its perfect time according to His perfect plan we will see the face of Jesus in everything we do.  What you thought you knew or tried to understand you will see with all the divine grace of His holy kingdom.  I am grateful that God has a plan and humbled that occasionally my life and heart are in such a position that I catch the glimpses He reveals to me.  Is it because I am wise?  No, probably not.  But a child of His grace nonetheless.  XOXO...Kelly

Roots.

Since Mother's Day was Sunday, please enjoy this heartwarming tale on motherhood.  When Michael was one day old--we were still in the hospital--several people came to visit all at once.  It was late in the day.  He was tired, I was tired and he wouldn't stop crying.  A well-meaning nurse shooed everyone from the room.  I swaddled him in a blanket, put him in the bassinet and pushed him into the corner away from the light.  Instantly he stopped crying.  All he needed was to be left alone and sleep.  I remember at the time being shocked that I managed to fix the problem so quickly, and it was in that moment I knew I was where I was meant to be, as a mother.  When I start to doubt my maternal abilities I remind myself of this experience.  I do, in fact, have what it takes.  I know this because God has put it inside of me and what is rooted in God's will can not fail.  If I can manage to succeed with a newborn baby one day after a major C-section and following my first sleepless night surely I can succeed on a day when the sun is shining and my hair looks good.  Do you trust that God has you rooted today?  Whether it's your job, your role as a parent, a spouse, a student, a sibling "I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know that this love surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God." (Ephesians 3:17-19)  A few short months after our experience in the hospital, I was giving that same sweet angel baby a bath at home.  As I smiled and sang to him and cooed I missed that he had pooped in the water.  I somehow managed to scoop the poop up in the wash cloth and then smear it all over his body as if it was soap.  It's a good thing Michael's got his roots in the right place, too.  Life is full of poo.  :)  XOXO...Kelly 

 

A shout out to all the Pogue women out there on this one. :)

I have the tendency to be bossy and controlling.  It is a wonder my sisters still talk to me.  They probably think that if they don't answer my calls I'll just show up at their homes.  This is true.  I would totally do that.  I come by this trait honestly.  I once watched my mother, grandmother and two aunts all stir the same pan of vegetables to see if I was cooking it correctly.  Our family gatherings usually include a lot of unsolicited advice followed by exasperation the whole drive home that no one would take our unsolicited advice.  "They'll see!!  They'll see and they'll be sorry!"  (It's not so much that we don't want success for other people.  It's just that we would prefer other people succeed because we were right.  I know, I know.  There should be an island for people like us.)  Under the right circumstances--natural disasters, church potluck dinners, 5-year old t-ball games--this sort of personality trait can come in very handy.  If only I was better at knowing when to turn it off.  At any rate, it should come as no surprise that I produced children who also have the same tendencies.  There is nothing that gets under the skin of my 5 and 6 year old sons more than when another brother is not doing what they want him to do.  They are so blinded by their drive to be right that often common sense eludes them.  Only one of my children so far has wised up enough to know that if you want another brother to do what you say you have to add "Mom said" to your command.  (I'll add that it is child #3 that figured this out.  He's the smallest of my boys but by position probably the toughest.  If you're looking for a good piece of unsolicited advice today, do NOT get on the wrong side of a fight with this boy.  Seriously, he'll get you.)  It only took a handful of disagreements before it occurred to Zachary that he was not going to get far on his own authority.  And like my ornery little friend, this is true for most of us as well.  We have the privilege to walk in Christ's authority every day.  At Matthew 28 Jesus commissions the disciples, "All authority in heaven and earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations".  Any power, any goodness, any mercy or grace that we possess starts here, with the authority given to us in Christ Jesus.  And when we walk in God's authority things get done! His power far exceeds anything we can come up.  "My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me" (2 Cor 12:9).  When I rely on God's power to work through me for the good of His will I am walking in Christ's authority.  When I rely on my own ridiculous self to get things done, well, I might as well be screaming at a 5 year old to give me a turn with his monster truck.  Walk in God's authority today, friends, and rest in the peace that it can not fail.  XOXO....Kelly   

Saturday Morning

This Saturday I participated in two of the most cut throat suburban activities in Northwest Harris County...I attended our church's mega garage sale and a YMCA t-ball game.

PART ONE...The Garage Sale. I do not "garage sale" frequently (around here you can use the term garage sale as a verb). I lack a certain aggressiveness necessary to really nab super great deals. Also, my friend and I walked in with no sort of shopping bags and we had Starbucks coffee with us. It's really hard to get into bargain hunting when you're down to only one hand. Still, I learned a few things. 1-If you ignore everyone around you and only focus on the stuff in front of you, you have better luck. This takes some practice, but fortunately a solid year of ignoring Lego arguments and poop jokes has helped. 2-Don't stop and chat with people. This only gives the people you are supposed to be ignoring the chance to swoop in and snag a deal right out from underneath you. 3-If you must pay attention to someone else let it only be because you are quietly stalking them to see if they will walk away from a certain item so you can swoop in and take it. I did this. I might have looked a little creepy doing it, but at least my creepy booty was sitting in a steal of a deal rocking recliner when all was said and done. So hah! I barely arrived home in time to head out for the second adventure of the day, a t-ball game at the YMCA.

PART TWO...The YMCA. It was Happy Healthy Kids day or something like that at the Y. There was a bounce house, a fun run, snacks, etc. If your local Y is hosting a Happy Healthy Kids day it also pretty much means it is going to be hosting Cranky Irate Parents day. The extra programs mean more visitors so parking is a nightmare. On top of that it was also picture day for all of the sport teams. But since the Y was so crowded you had to go down the street for that. Put that on top of the parking issue and all the games were running late. Can you imagine?! A 4/5 year old t-ball game that started five minutes late?! Will little Johnny get enough chances to run the wrong way around the bases each time he's at bat while the opposing teammates dog pile for the ball every inning if we run five minutes behind? You might guess that the same strategy proven so effective at garage sales also works for YMCA t-ball games....ignore all the people around you. Except for the kids, of course. They are precious! And precisely the point of being there at all, which we so quickly forget amid the parking and team picture woes.

Yes, like garage sales and T-ball, so many things are put before us by the Lord full of wonderful and divine purpose and we, with best intentions, totally misunderstand. The only way to beat it is to stay close to God, my friends. If you're ignoring everyone else around you let it be because your eyes are focused so wholly on Him!! In our house this week we are learning the verse, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me". I often think of this verse in terms of overcoming an obstacle, accomplishing some great goal. Sometimes that is as simple as getting through your Saturday morning with a healthy perspective still in tact. To be strong in Christ is to be strong in His direction, in tune with His purpose. It's to see things as the gifts that they are instead of the distractions we let them become. Saturday morning was well on its way to crazy, but Lord when I look at you I see instead a fun outing with a friend and a chance to see my kids stretch their legs and enjoy the fellowship of others. Thank you that you have good things in mind for me, Lord, and help strengthen me to see them that way, too.  AMEN!  XOXO...Kelly

God Bless John Michael Montgomery

There are two kinds of people in the world--those that like the "Christmas Shoes" song and those that don't.  I love all of you, but if you fall into the first category I will probably never ask you to make me a mixed tape.  And should you make me one anyway I will probably never listen to it.  I fall into the second category.  I can not stand that song.  All the joy and glory of Christmas displayed so beautifully in so many different songs and we have to hear about a poor boy trying to buy shoes for his dying mother.  Before you go off calling me callous and unfeeling let me just say that, hate it as I do, that stupid song still gets me almost every time.  In case you didn't think it was possible to both tear up and feel totally annoyed at the same time, well, it is.  Thanks for the hormones, God!!  Anyway, there is another song that evokes a similar reaction from me.  "The Little Girl" by John Michael Montgomery is about a little girl who hides behind the couch while her alcoholic dad kills her mom and himself.  Later, when the girl is at church for the first time with foster parents, she sees a picture of Jesus and the song says, "She said I know that man up there on that cross-- I don't know His name--But I know He got off--Cause He was there in my old house--and held me close to His side--As I hid there behind our couch--The night that my parents died."  See?  Waterworks!!  It's been a few weeks now since Easter.  In our house we've just firmed up plans for the summer, are focusing on finishing out the school year, planning swimming lessons and T-ball practice, and I've begun to think about how nice it will be when the boys clean out the van for me on Mother's Day.  So in case you're like me and need a little grounding today in the midst of all the spring madness let the words of this ridiculous country song remind you of two most important and treasured things....  (1) Jesus got off that cross (AMEN!!!!) and (2) His arms are holding you today no matter where you are (DOUBLE AMEN!!!).  If that ain't enough to make you turn your pick up truck around and hug your mama I don't know what is.  Where the excitement of the Easter bunny, baskets and eggs has come and gone, the assurance of Christ's resurrection and enduring presence is here now and forevermore.  Christ is alive and well today, friend!!  Let us each feel his arms around us wherever we are!  XOXO...Kelly
 

Poodles and Ferrets

Did anyone see the Yahoo news article last week about the man that bought two toy poodles at a market in Argentina and it turns out the "poodles" were really steroid-injected ferrets?  Seriously, this happened and I have been making ferret poodle jokes for several days now because of it.  This week's news reports are much more unsettling.  People work hard, make plans and are met instead with personal tragedy, national outrage and unspeakable sorrow.  If I may be so poetic, ferrets stand where poodles should be.  I am personally so angry today.  I am angry that it was hard to go to sleep last night.  I am angry that fear follows me to the grocery store.  I am angry my children may not always be safe.  I am angry that evil meets us where good should be instead.  But I REFUSE to put my head down.  "No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money" (Matthew 6: 24). Money is one of those necessary evils. We have to have it, but it can not be our focus. Disappointment, anger, frustration, sorrow...these are necessary evils in the same way. From time to time we will encounter them, must deal with them, and let God move us on.  We must not serve them.  I don't know what the man did with the animals, but supposing he kept them I am sure he's altering his plans now.  Buying a large cage, new food, a litter box, probably a book or two on what to do with ferrets, and moving on.  I serve God.  I serve hope, I serve faith, I serve goodness.  And I am angry that some people make this so hard!!!!  But, again, I REFUSE to put my head down.  Dear God, you reign sovereign over us.  Whether good or evil stands before me, poodles or ferrets, I will serve YOU and only YOU.  Please be with those that have lost this week, those that are hurting, those that feel helpless.  Bring the healing that we can only find in you, God.  And help us to move on.  Amen.  XOXO...Kelly

Target Practice

This is what I have learned from shopping at Target...you can not have it all.  No matter how cute/nifty/fashionable the item you are purchasing is, in another month (or maybe sooner) they are going to put out another product that is equally as cute/nifty/fashionable or maybe even more so.  This life lesson also applies to automobiles, cell phones, products found at Marshall's, products found at TJMaxx, products found at Kohl's, everything at the Carter's children's store, Craigslist bargains and, on behalf of some of my nearest and dearest family members, Ebay finds and Cabella's sporting goods.  This lesson does not, however, apply to jewelry.  Jewelry should be bought (and/or appropriately gifted) as often and as sparkly as possible.  There is no such thing as a gaudy diamond.  In fact, in case you're wondering what might the most appropriate size of diamond for someone in your life, a good suggestion is to look at the number of children they have.  For example, if your wonderful wife has born four children for you, well...you do the math.  But back to Target.  I could spend a lifetime chasing that crimson bulls-eye of happiness, but life's greatest peace for me is echoed in the tomb on Easter morning.  Funny that such emptiness can bring about such fullness.  Where else could Peter look in and see nothing, and that mean everything?  Christ is risen indeed!  He lies not in some tomb, His body decaying in the grave.  Instead He goes before me, walks beside me.  Death could not touch Him and in Him it can not touch me!  So Target, though I love you so, I think I'll wait until those lampshades I love go on clearance.  And if my time is up before then be sure to bury me with something sparkly.  I want to look good for those pearly gates, when I walk into the arms of my savior and leave Satan behind to restock the shelves.  XOXO....Kelly