8-minute miles

Isn't it curious the things we hold on to sometimes?  Like when I was training for the 1/2 marathon back in the winter.  I was obsessed with being too slow.  I couldn't believe that I couldn't beat an 11 minute mile.  I mean, I used to be able to run an 8 minute mile.  In seventh grade.  But somehow my mind totally ignored the fact that was 31 years ago and I was actually upset not to have run faster.

Last night I dreamt about a friend from high school I have not thought about in years.  An incident was brought to mind that I had nearly forgotten about, but now can't seem to stop dwelling on.  It's like the last 14 years haven't happened at all.  My feelings are right back where they were in high school. 

Now for those of you that know me well, this is truly ironic.  I've often remarked what a terrible therapist I would because the only real advice I'm capable of giving anyone is GET OVER IT.  Not entirely thoughtful is it?  I have zero tolerance for baggage and people that choose to carry it.  And yet, here I sit, suddenly burdened by what was a blink in time for my teenage self.  Why such a dream at such a time?  Oh, where is Joseph and his coat of many colors when I need him??

Paul gives this encouragement in Philippians.  "....I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.  Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it.  But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." 

In other words, get over it. 

It doesn't matter what happened yesterday.  Christ Jesus has taken hold of you.  You are redeemed.  You are a new creation.  His love does not erase your past.  It brings you up and out of it and beyond it, for He is greater than that which is in this world. 

Maybe I've never forgiven my friend.  Maybe I've never forgiven myself.  Maybe I've got to stop letting little boys and dachshunds wake me up all night and actually get some rest. 

But one thing is for certain.  Christ has taken hold of me.  Whatever the future holds He is already there.  To look back is to move away from the prize for which God has called me heavenward, to move away from all the He has in store for me.  I'm not who I once was, way back in high school or in seventh grade.  And, frankly, thank God for that!!

XOXO....Kelly