Flashback to Sandy, UT circa 1993, Hilltop United Methodist Church. A star was born. My first singing gig in an exclusive worship group called Praise. We had our own t-shirts and matching skirts. It was kind of a big deal. I had my first solo in a song called The Way, The Truth, The Life. It was a combination of jaw-dropping vocals and amazing dance movements. I blame/thank my parents for not owning a video camera. Here's a photo of what life looked like then.
Anyway, the song is based on the lyrics of the above-referenced verse and would be burned into my youthful brain for years to come. Sometimes God works like that. He plants a seed He knows you'll need later when you're a little older and much wiser to appreciate it.
THE WAY. Fast-forward to January 2007. I'm three weeks from the due date of our oldest son, Michael. (My praise t-shirt and matching skirt does not fit any longer for very obvious reasons.) In a freak, totally undeserved set of circumstances, Kevin loses his job. He had only graduated from law school 9 months before and taken the bar exam a short time later. I spent a good majority of the pregnancy praying that God would provide for us in such a way that I could stay home to raise our children. I had a good job, but it was not what I wanted. So when Kevin called with the news, I sat at the table in our tiny kitchen and dropped my head. I prayed these words, "Lord, let there be a way." And in that moment, the strangest peace came over me.
THE TRUTH. Michael was born on February 5. Through sleepless nights with a newborn and new mama hormones I fought back the panic of our unknown future and simply tried to remember the peace I felt that afternoon at my kitchen table. Kevin was doing contract work for a firm and enjoying it. We had a number, the salary it would take for me to be able to stay home with the baby. Everyday he went to work and everyday I prayed for God's providence. I was due back to work on May 20. On May 10 Kevin was offered a full time job with the firm he was doing contract work for. The salary offer was the exact number we needed.
THE LIFE. I've experienced a number of life-altering moments in my own lifetime, but none has had the impact on me that this one did. Even as we rejoiced, we considered, should I still go back to work? I mean, two salaries would be awfully nice and my job was really great. But no one can serve both God and money. And when you've spent the last 12 months praying for God to provide, and then He does it, you don't just hand it back. At that point it became clear to me, for the first time ever, what it meant to live in God's will. To rest, no matter how hard, no matter how tempted, in His peace.
We all feel like Thomas and the disciples did from time to time. Lost. Unsure. How will we know the way? And that's why churches put groups of preteen heart-throbs together to remind you, in perfect harmony, of His word. We know because HE IS.
He is the Way.
He is the Truth.
He is the Life.
And there's no other way around it.
Whatever you're struggling with, have you handed it over to God yet? And if He's answered, have you said yes? There is peace for you, friends. There is a Savior who loves you, sees you where you are and meets you where you're going. I don't know this because I'm smart, because I'm good at singing or because I've got extra special connections with the Big Guy upstairs. I know this because I made a commitment 7 1/2 years ago at my tiny kitchen table to trust in His way, to trust in His truth and to trust in His life.
And now there's no other way around it.
XOXO....Kelly
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